StoryRhyme After Dark: Rosemary's Baby

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Rosemary's Baby
By Harry Buschman


Agnes couldn't wait to get to the phone. She fumbled dialing Beatrice's number and had to do it over again. "Beatrice! I couldn't wait to call you," she bubbled over breathlessly.  

"What have you been up to, Agnes? Ernie up to his old tricks again?" Ernie was Agnes's husband and he did get himself in a lot of trouble in Westlake Village.

"Neither Beatrice, it's the new baby. Rosemary's baby... I just saw it. She was out walking it the stroller this afternoon." Agnes paused for another breath. "You'll never believe it."

"I'll bet it's cute... She's got a hunk of a husband."

"Agnes, it's a monster. You'll have to see it yourself."

To be honest, Agnes’s baby was a strange looking child. A shock of coarse red hair down to its shoulders. Big shoe button eyes. A smile that went from one ear to another––if indeed it had ears. There was no sign of them. When Agnes asked Rosemary if it was a boy or a girl, Rosemary shrugged her shoulders and said the doctors were still working on that. "Everything in good time," she added. "We've been waiting so long for a baby, we can wait a little longer to find out whether it's a boy or a girl."

Everybody in town was anxious to see Rosemary's baby and by the time they did they were well aware of what to expect so they practiced their gushing responses before they stopped her in the street. Even the menfolk that hung around Westlake Auto Repair passed around a few observant remarks... “Helluva lookin' kid, ain't it... Jeez, I'd throw it back if it wuz mine."

Time passed. Rosemary and her husband mutually agreed that the baby was a boy, because it couldn't possibly pass as a girl. They named it Andy – actually the infant picked the name "Andy,” out of his father's hat, so you could say he chose the name himself. 

As time dragged on he grew up. He did well in school. Excelled in athletics, but the girls kept well clear of him even though he finished Westlake high school as the star quarterback and played trumpet in the band. The girls thought he was too weird to date, and the thought of kissing him goodnight would send them into gales of laughter. But he was granted a full tuition and board grant to McGill University and achieved a PhD degree in biotechnology. His monograph was delivered in French, a language he only learned a week before his dissertation.

He went on to Pfizer Pharmaceuticals as chief toxicologist and developed many life saving and prolonging procedures, finally winning the Nobel Prize for medicine last year. 

When the news reached Westlake Village, the flush of reflected glory spread its warmth to his family and friends. Agnes called his mother and father immediately... "Dear Rosemary," she said. "I knew from the day I first saw him that he was destined for greatness, I remember calling Beatrice to give her the good..." 

There was a click on the other end of the line.

(c) 2015 Harry Buschman
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